"Trust me. I'm a Doctor" aaaaaand FINISHED HALF MARATHON!!

Paranoia is a pretty prevalent symptom amongst not only mental disorders but normal mental fluctuation as well. That said, it makes it easier for me to accept my paranoid ways with less gravitas. Most of the time my subconscious is nursing a little bit of paranoia over what I am consciously sure of as temporary mysterious bodily glitches. I often suspect the presence of stress fractures, swollen glands, west nile and dehydration without consulting a professional (Wikepedia excepting).


HOWEVER, I have secretly thought I had a melanoma buried deep in the delicate tissues of my bottom lip for at least twelve months now. In fact, I can remember quite accurately a day last November when I spent and entire aerobics class alternately bouncing around and wondering how anyone would ever love me once my lip had been removed. This cancer paranoia has persisted all summer egged on by an infrequent throbbing from that general area of my lip. But enough is enough. Yesterday I went to the dermatologist. I sought enlightenment and healing. Or at least validation.


Silly girl.


I got a quick cold-finger probing of my bottom lip followed by a rapid explanation about how dead cells sometimes never heal and then, before I could even ask what that miniature fire extinguisher thingy was used for, a blast of liquid nitrogen on the offending spot. I was told to call in a month if the problem persisted.

Now, a day later, my lip is doubled in size and throbbing like a drum.

***

I may have a fat lip but I finished the half marathon! GO ME! No more training hanging over my head. Thanks are in order. First, to Big Daddy and Lester for coming all the way from Denver to support me and run the race with me. Second to Pamchencko for riding all those miles on her bike and for all the Gatorade and steaks. And lastly 50 Cent, Stereophonics, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Beastie Boys for their musical genius.

Alaska Trip Highlights

Fresh from the airplane we went whale watching.

The sight of the whales was so moving that I had to pontificate to the rest of my tour mates about what a privilege it was to share the water with such mammoth yet benign creatures, at which point I was ridiculed.

We also took a tour of a botanical garden that was planted after a landslide. The hippie-landscape-architect owner decided to leave the upturned trees and use them for planters. The entire tour I kept wishing Big Daddy was with me to marvel at all of the botanical wonders. One of them being lichen which are so rare because they can only grow in very clean environments. Who knew?

I arrived in Juneau during that very special and aromatic time that the salmon spawned. Salmon at this point have stopped eating in order to put all of their energy into preserving the eggs they carry and getting back to the very same spot they were born. They some times get trapped in inlets when the tide goes out. At which point you can catch them with your bare hands.

This is highly illegal. He promptly returned this bloke to it's watery home so it could go on it merry decomposing-from-the-inside-out way.

My favorite part of the trip was a hike we took around Mendenhall Lake

Here:

Up and under the Mendenhall (eat your heart out Dev!) Glacier

Here:

To some blue caves

We also got a great shot of Juneau and the Gastineau Channel from the top of Mt. Roberts.

In closing I would like to thank Pod and Pamchenko for their generosity, myself for finally graduating from college in order to make this trip happen, and the Silverbow Bakery for making such delectable Rhubarb Squares. But mostly I want to thank Babs and the entire ACT Company for being so gracious, friendly and entertaining (ie dramatic) during my stay.

OH and last but not least...

I did see a few bears. This one hung out in a tree and stuck his tongue out at the tourists. I named him George W.

Later Skaters

Tomorrow night is my last night working at KOTM. Mixed feelings. It has been the best second job I've ever had. Maybe the only second job. For that reason- second jobs suck. You are already knackered from your first eight hours. Then you gotta care about someone/thing else for another four? That's tough for someone as self absorbed as me. I need ME time and this second job eats it all up. But as far as second jobs go this one has been the shizzle. I get to update m'blog, read celebrity gossip, stalk people on face book and finish homework. Sometimes.
Also, I get a good feeling knowing there are high caliber people out there who volunteer on a weekly basis. I sit here at reception and smile at their good deeds, all the while sampling books and music on ebay. Then lock up after they go. It's cush. So cush that two of my coworkers from my day job are duking it out over who gets to inherit my position when I've gone. I should maybe barter with them for the job. Or something. Like that scene in Fever Pitch where Jimmy Fallon ( mmmmm, Jimmy Fallon) makes his mates dance for ball game ticks.

Ode to Sisters

Bunny sent me this picture in an email last week with the following caption. 'These two girls were taking respite in the lounge of a bathroom at a party, the girl in blue suffering from a broken heart and the girl in the red there to comfort. (Her mother made the red dress for her) their cousin shot the picture after stumbling upon them.' Le sigh.

My Sweaty Valentine

It was a big mistake signing up to run the Hobble Creek Half Marathon. For many reasons. But on my long run last Saturday I found that training isn't all bad. Especially if you have a Running Boyfriend.


I know you think that I am desperate and making this up. More so if you are in my family but my mom and Bunny were there to back up the story. For corroborative details see them. Haters.


Bunny had given her last valiant push past the 3.5 mile mark and then stopped to catch her breath. P. hung back on her bike with Bunny and I, as a last effort at courage for the next three miles, turned up my music. Soon Running Boyfriend, in his athletic prowess caught up with P. and Bunny. Unbeknownst to me, he amicably introduced himself- chatting with them about his training routine and, no doubt, the very flattering view they shared of my backside.


As R.B. caught up to me I only mildly acknowledged his existence. Not because I am coy, but because I long ago converted to the church of realism where sleek, energetic men do not bother to chat up huffing, red-faced wannabes. Also, I was trying to get into the zone to ward off the unavoidable pain and suffering that lay ahead.


But R.B. is persistent. Probably part of his Jedi-Runner training regime. After his first greeting, which I couldn't hear for the music pumping in my ears, he tried again and I was forced to read his lips. He said something to the effect of 'how's it going?'. I grimaced hideously and shouted, 'NOT SO GOOD.' thinking he would be amused as intended and get on his merry lithesome way. BUT NO. He then mouthed something to the effect of 'was I running in the Hobble Creek Half?' I nodded, too tired for words and quite baffled by this cheerful person taking such an interest in my masochistic plans. I kept waiting for him to get back to his normal pace and leave me to my wretchedness. Right when I thought he was going to oblige he turned around to face me and, running backwards at this point, started saying something that I could not hear as he was now about six feet ahead of me. I did, however, manage to catch last sentence about how he had hidden a Gatorade along the trail and would leave part of it for me. ??? With more enthusiasm than I felt, I shouted back that 'I would run to it', at the same time thinking, 'what makes you think I'm even gonna make it that far? Can't you see that I'm a novice? That I don't talk to males unless coerced. Much less engage in camaraderatory drink sharing with 2% body fat charmers!'


Phew, and he was gone. I promptly forgot him as I tried to distract myself by pretending I was a cross-country running Stevie Nicks type character with wild hair and fast shoes.


Unless all of the nuance of this post has been lost on you thus far, I'll say it simply - I am not a serious runner. For a definition of what a serious runner is just go here. You'll get all hype you want in full color. That said, I (in my ignorance) have not given a second thought to properly hydrating my body during my previous training. Indeed, it has been enough of a challenge to get myself from one run to the next without planning how I would stay hydrated. Then again I hadn't really been putting in the miles until lately. I finally stopped to walk just short of six miles because I was light headed and positively desperate for something to drink. So you can imagine my mistaking my body's insistent call for anything liquid for True Love at the sight of an Orange Gatorade bottle place conscientiously in a shady spot at the end of my run. R.B., to my grateful delight, was good for his word. What more can I want in a man?

The Last Frontier

I was welcomed home from Alaska with an overflowing work inbox and a health hazard kitchen. My roomate's eyes widened in surprise when she insisted that she cleaned and the place was sparkling only two days before.....two days, she promises. Urgh.

But Alaska was fabuloska. My favorite bit was the hike underneath a mammoth glacier to some dripping ice caves. Also, the clouds come down the mountains and envelope the ferny forest to the point that I was sure that Darcy was going to come striding through the mist, coat tails flapping, shirt partially open, to claim me. Then I would never have had to return to my job or disgusting kitchen. I'll post some pics as soon as I get them. Have to. Dev has discreetly informed me that nobody wants to read a blog without pictures.

Babs and I laughed and gossiped and danced and hiked and laughed some more. We are both bruised from multiple falls on the hike. High amounts of rain fall = moss and mold and slime + us not paying attention due to attempted Southern Accents means actual bodily harm.

In closing, I wish to point out the exquisite intelligence of the salmon: they swim back to the exact spot they were born at to spawn. Sometimes extremely far distances. We're talking from Hawaii back to the waters of Juneau. WTH!?! Seriously smart fish. Oh, and I also got teary eyed upon seeing an acutal whale tale during a whale watch. It was magnificent.